It’s time once again for Heather Johnson from Family Volley to share with us some Parenting Tips as part of her “Parenting Tips” here on The Idea Room. Here’s Heather in her own words…
First, we have to start with ourselves and Be Good Role Models
Children will do what they see us do. We can’t be disrespectful.
We need to model the behavior we want to see in our children. Respect our belongings, be patient and open minded with others, and listen with full attention.
Expect Good Manners
Don’t let children think that manners are optional or temporary.
Don’t Tolerate Rudeness
When we allow our children to be rude, talk back, or talk snotty, we lead them to believe it’s okay to disrespect us and other people too. As parents we need to respond to this behavior. We need to make it clear that no matter how frustrated or annoyed our children may be, it is never okay to speak to other people in those tones.
Encourage your kids to express their feelings, using statement that start with “I”. “I feel angry and frustrated”. “I feel mad”. Encourage them to put their feelings into words by asking them questions. When our son is making sarcastic comments, I find myself saying “you seem upset, let’s talk about it”. It will take time for your kids to learn to express their emotions instead of being rude, but it will work. When they slip up, teach them the importance of saying “I am sorry”.
Don’t let children disrespect belongings.
Teach Your Children to Listen
One of the most fundamental ways to show respect to other people is to listen to them. That means giving them our time and attention. Don’t let your kids watch television while you are trying to talk to them…or keep their head down in their books, coloring, or looking at the floor.
Diversity Makes the World go Around
Encourage Your Children to be Open Minded
Treating others with respect means that we take some time to get to know them and understand them. This is a principle we have to teach our children. They might not like all the other kids, but they need to give them a chance.
Lastly, Rules are important
Don’t allow children to do what ever they want.
Instead…Set boundaries. Believe it or not, children want rules and boundaries. This will help children learn to respect authority and that the world doesn’t revolve around them. This is a skill they will need in everything they do.
- HOW DO YOU TEACH YOUR CHILDREN RESPECT?
- DO YOU THINK THAT KIDS HAVE LESS RESPECT THESE DAYS?
- ANYONE FEEL LIKE THEY SENT THEIR KIDS TO SCHOOL AT 5, W/RESPECT, AND THEY CAME HOME W/OUT RESPECT?
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What a great post – everything you said is so true. I have got Respect up there as one of the most important things to teach my children. Respect for themselves and respect for others. Once they have that, they can go anywhere.
April S. says
Such a great post! We are struggling through a rough spot with our kids right now – they are 8 and 3. They know how to be respectful and are very good when they are with other people and pretty good when we are in public, however, the TV and other distractions have become a bigger problem. I think part is they’ve hit the next “testing” phase and part is that we have been lax in enforcement at times. This is a good reminder of the basics.
Respect is definitely something that needs to be cultivated more and more and it takes lots of time and reminders. Thanks, Heather, for the suggestions.
Her Sunday says
Excellent post! One of the values my mother taught me that I am most grateful for was the importance of respect for others. It is one of the first lessons that I will teach my children as well.
Hollie C says
I really enjoyed this post. My husband and I have used serveal of your “suggestions” raising our daughter. Respect is one of the most important values we can teach our childern.
Lex Malla Books says
Excellent post. More kids need to have respect and more parents need to teach their kids respect. Thanks for the post!
I preach this constantly to my daycare children. The parents say they agree but their actions say otherwise.
I hope you don’t mind, I am going to print this out and share it with my families. Maybe it will help coming from another source.
I want to thank you for giving tips on what to do. So often people say, you shouldn’t do this or you shouldn’t do that but they never tell you what you should do. It’s so much more productive when you have ideas to start with.
I love this, because my mom taught me all of these things, and I try to teach them to my nieces and nephews when their parents won’t do so. Especially my fiance’s nephew. I’m only 23 and I know that this is good common sense and people need to stop being afraid of their children and be parents. You took on that responsibility, so follow through. Thank you for posting. :)
quick question, did you already announce the winner of the vintage pearl giveaway? I want to make sure I didn’t miss it :) thanks!
I really enjoyed reading this post. While kids in general may be more disrespectful nowadays I believe there are plenty of great kids with parents who are teaching them correct behavior. I also find there are regional differences. I spent a few years living in the South and I got a kick out of my friends’ kids. They were taught you always say Mr. or Ms. followed by the adult’s name – so I was always Ms. Melanie. I thought this was such a great way for kids to always be reminded to be respectful to adults.
I was blog hopping and found you. Fabulous post! Thank you! My husband and I try hard to teach our 5 and 3 year old respect for others and their things. Sometimes it is a struggle, but we know we are doing something right because tonight after dinner after my 3 year old didn’t follow the rules she had to pay the consequence and on her own she apologized for her behavior. It was so rewarding!
I also want to put out there, I have my kids say Mr. or Ms. to adults older than me because it seems strange to have them do so to my friends. Should I teach them to do the same for my close friends?
I take care of my 3 grandchildren for my daughter as she is going through a divorce and has a very demanding job.
I am 64 it is sometimes very tough for me to handle all three of them when I have to go to the store or take one of them to the doctors for my daughter.
They are 10, 7, and 4. the ten year old is always telling the other two what to do even when I am there, it is really tough for me as he just will not stop and I am not sure how to get him to understand that I am the adult here and will handle it. suggestions please. Thank you, Robin